![]() “In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.” - Charles Schulz.“Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.” - Andy Rooney.“If at first you don’t succeed then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” - Steven Wright."Practice what you preach." - Anonymous.There's no such thing as being overprepared.When you're looking for a saying to help you deal with the ups and downs of day-to-day life, a short original motto, popular saying or quote that provides funny words to live by might be exactly what you need. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.” - Steven Wright If you can fake that, you've got it made.” - Groucho Marx “The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing.Tact is for those who aren’t funny enough for sarcasm.If you have to go around telling people how awesome you are, there's a pretty good chance that you're the only one who actually thinks so.If you don't know who it is that everyone in the family complains about, it's probably you.Perhaps you would benefit from adult supervision.No one is as smart as you think you are.You've perfected overthinking as an art form.There are too many witnesses for me to tell you what I really think.If I cared, I would have listened the first time. If you don't want me to tell you what I really think, you'd best refrain from asking for my opinion.This will go much faster if you just accept that I am right.No one looks like their profile picture.Don't act like I'm a character in your reality show.Enjoy a few original quotes followed by quotes attributed to other sources, then explore these funny oxymoron quotes. You can't have a collection of funny life quotes without including some sarcastic sayings. “Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.” - Tom Stoppard.“All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.” - Sean O'Casey.“There are good days and there are bad days, and this is one of them.” - Lawrence Welk.“The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.” - George Carlin."Life is like a cobweb, not an organization chart." – Ross Perot."Life is like a box of chocolates." - Forrest Gump in Forrest Gump by Winston Groom.Smile while you still have teeth." - Anonymous Your life is your story you can write out any characters who aren't enhancing the plot.There's nothing like a little alone time to make you appreciate your own company.It's amazing how many people have developed shockingly blue eyes since Facebook filters were invented.If your carriage turns into a pumpkin, call an Uber.If you're around someone who sucks all the air out of the room, go to another room.That's a life lesson I could have done without.Whatever you do in life, do it with enthusiasm. #Deep quotes about life full#There's no need to turn on the heat at the family reunion the room will be full of hot air.Pets: the family members you get to choose.Life is like homemade ice cream: sweet and seasonal.The list below begins with original quotes followed by some from public figures. Looking for a funny quote or saying to reflect the humor that underlies many facets of life? From life's many lessons, struggles and joys to the always interesting realities of life, you might find the perfect words in these funny life quotes, including some on the topic of family. ![]()
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